A Custom Farewell Song for Your Coworker

Friday is their last day, and on Monday that desk belongs to somebody else, or to nobody, which is worse. You have sat near this person for four years. You know how they take their coffee, what they say when a meeting runs long, which of the two printers they refuse to use. You have also never seen their house.

That is the strange part of a work goodbye. It was a real friendship that only existed between nine and six inside one building, and unless somebody does something about it, it ends when the laptop goes back to IT. The card gets signed by twenty people and says good luck four different ways.

A song is the version that survives the last day. Put the specifics in it: the standing Tuesday call that never once started on time, the mug with the chip in it that everyone knew not to touch, the phrase they said so often it became the name of a Slack channel. Those are the details that only exist inside that building, and a card has no room for them.

Do not overthink the tone. Funny, with one honest line near the end, is right for a team. Nobody wants to cry in a conference room at four on a Friday afternoon.

You get an original studio-quality song written from your details, $19.99, delivered by email within 24 hours, which is enough time if you only heard about the leaving drinks yesterday.

Post one question in the team channel: what is the thing about them we are all going to miss? Send us the replies.