The Perfect Retirement Song for a Dedicated Nurse

"Go ask her, she'll know." Half the unit has said that at some point, usually with a family waiting in the hallway and a new grad who needs an answer in the next thirty seconds. Her last shift is Friday, and after that the schedule posts without her name on it and the question goes to somebody else.

Write the song about her, not about nursing. Most retirement tributes turn into a list of what she did for patients, which is true and also interchangeable with every other nurse on the unit. What is not interchangeable is her. The coffee she leaves half finished on the counter. The Christmas Eve shifts she took so people with small kids could be home. The thing she says at every shift change. The name the night crew gave her that never appeared on a single document. That is the material.

A couple of practical notes. It plays fine off a phone and a portable speaker, which is the sound system the break room actually has. And if a few of you are chipping in, collect details from three or four coworkers rather than one, because the joke that runs on nights is rarely the one days would pick, and we want both.

You do not need to write lyrics. Send us the notes and we write and produce it. An original studio-quality song written from your details, $19.99, delivered by email within 24 hours, so you can order it midweek and still have it for Friday. Start a group text tonight and ask everyone on the unit for one story about her.